So we went to a water park today. Actually, we have gone twice in the last 3 days. We are in Aurora Illinois at Orchard Community Church. Its an awesome church. Spoke here Wednesday, and am speaking in the morning too. Anyways, there is a water park directly behind the church. When I say behind the church, I mean like 100 yards away. And when I say water park, I am being generous. Its called Splash Country, but its more like Splash Village. It has a pool, two water slides, and a lazy river. Spent both trips just floating in the lazy river relaxing. Because its small they offer a twilight rate of $4 if you go after 4 pm, so it is a great cheap way to relax. I love it.
What I don't love are the crazy lifeguards. First off, there wasn't a single brunette lifeguard. I know this seems like a dumb thing to notice, but it is rather off putting when every one of them looks like a Stepford wife. Second, they are all like 15. There was one I saw today that looked 8. Seriously, he was barely 5 feet tall and maybe 80 pounds soaking wet. I would hate to have one of these tiny people trying to pull me out of the water lifeless. Although it would be fun to watch them try and pull out some of the big guys I saw today. No way it would happen. They would pop a tube trying. Finally, they are nazi's. They yell and blow there whistle like its the only air and if they don't they will die. Seriously, I saw a lifeguard yell at a kid for dunking his head in the water on the lazy river because you are supposed to stay above your tube. That would be one thing, but the same lifeguard had nothing to say to the man who let out a stream of profanity when he got splashed. He also had nothing to say to the hippie that was feeding her baby (naturally) in the river for all to see.....that is, all to see EVERYTHING. Felt like a really odd trip where I as an adult went to relax, but was automatically turned into an 8 year old that had done something wrong. Either way, I got some sun, and relaxed, and will go to bed smelling of chlorine. And that my friends is a good thing, any way you look at it.
peace - love - recycle






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